08-02-2018 ill and abroad: a detailed account

Date
Saturday 3rd of February

Scene
Lying in bed in a hotel room on the 4th floor of our favourite Hotel in El Coca, the Rio Napo. 

8pm
And so occurred the last in a series of bad decisions: a massive bowl of pasta for dinner. Accompanied with soy sauce (beggars can’t be choosers) and sweetcorn, this was the final nail in my coffin. 

8:30pm
A slight stomach ache. Did I eat too much pasta? Perhaps the Asian / Italian combo wasn’t agreeing with me. I put it out of my mind and settled in for the night. 

11:30pm
Stomach ache reached fever pitch. Something was not right. Fear started to creep in that I’d caught the same 24 hour bug that wiped Heather out a few days ago. It looked nasty.

11:45pm
Denial. Pain, nausea, diarrhoea and denial. I was so tired 4 hours previously and at this point I was more awake than ever. Surely I hadn’t caught the bug, surely not.

Midnight.
Toilet blocked. In my haste and pain, I forgot you’re not meant to put tissues down the toilet. Contents of toilet filled to the brim, and absolutely nothing I could do about it.

12:15am
Vomit time. I ran to the loo and threw up only to have it splashed back in my face. Not ideal. Turned to the left and threw up my entire bowl of pasta into the shower. Now I’m in a pickle. 

12:30am
Toilet blocked, shower blocked and the vomit wouldn’t stop. 

1am
Messaged friends and family informing them that I had fallen victim to the stomach bug as well and would be accepting sympathy for the next couple of days.

1:45am
Tripped on the way to the bathroom and fell over, threw up on the floor. Brilliant.

2am
Earache getting worse and worse. My ear had been blocked for a few days but I had put it down to a cold and water in my ear, but the pain suggested something more sinister.

3:30am
My body now almost emptied, I decided it was time to do something about the mess. In my delirium, I thought it would be a good idea to try and rinse away the vomit in the shower. Turns out chunks of pasta won’t go down a plughole. Next bright idea, move vomit from shower to bin with tissues and hands. Mediocre success. 

4:30am
Parents were online on Skype. Finally, someone to care for me. Spoke to mum and dad for 45 minutes, threw up 3 times on the call, watched my cute little kitten bite the camera, and agreed to see a doctor in the morning about my ear. 

5am
Discovered that everything that had gone down the loo in the last 6 hours was now regurgitating back up into my shower. If you stood in the shower, it would have come up above your ankles. Felt really hard done by at this point.

5:30am
Vomiting and diarrhoea starting to subside, desperate nausea slowly fading away. Readying myself for some sleep. 

6:30am
Hadn’t expulsed any liquids in half an hour, good sign. Earache getting really painful, bad sign.

8am
In AGONY. Facebook messaged hotel owner asking for doctor to be sent to my room. Exhausted, empty, delirious, feverish and in excruciating pain. 

9am
No one had replied to my messages. Feeling lonely and isolated, as well as desperately ill.

10am
Confirmation that doctor would indeed be on his way in 20 minutes.

4:30pm
Doctor arrived.

4:45pm
Post examination, I learnt that I had a bacterial infection in my intestines, and both a fungal and bacterial infection in my right ear. Prescribed a bag of drugs including two diclofenac injections, a course of antibiotics for 12 days and antimycotics for 10 days. 

5pm
Injection administered into bottom by hotel manager in spare hotel room. (Not (too) dodgy, she used to own a pharmacy).

The next day
Ear leaking mucus and black stuff. Umm…

Present (8th of Feb, Midday, back at Station)
Little improvement. Decided to share my story in the hope that it would make a few people laugh (and count their blessings). Want to remind readers that we’re all human, and all of us shit, piss and vomit.

Thank you