I am deliriously happy right now. I woke up this morning in a state of bliss and contentment. You see, for the first time in a week, I woke up because I was ready to wake up, rather than because I was in excrutiating pain. I’ve had a fungal ear infection which has been just horrific. I would unabashadley use the word agony to describe my pain even though it may sound dramatic. It was absolutely unbearable at times; I felt nauseous, was in too much pain to sleep, and painkillers didn’t really work. By the end of the week, I was taking paracetamol, ibuprofen, diclofenac and codeine, and it still wasn’t enough. As the days went on, the pain didn’t get worse or better, but spread to the back of my head, my throat, my neck, my right eye and my right cheek. I am half deaf in my right ear, and its been leaking puss and mucous. So basically not very fun, river fungi 1, sophie 0.
So waking up without pain was a miracle. I’m honestly not sure how much longer I could have kept going for, especially considering I was averaging 3/4 restless hours of sleep a night, when I am very much an 8/9 kinda girl. Today was my 2nd follow-up doctors appointment to get my ear cleaned out. I was meant to have it cleaned on wednesday but it was still too swollen and inflamed at that point. So this morning when I woke up without pain I was really glad because that meant the inflammation had gone down and I could get my ear flushed out. So I set off on my journey to Coca this morning excited and ready to get my hearing back and hopefully say bye to all the puss and mucous.
It didn’t really turn out like that. The doctor did indeed clean out my ear, but this was not the pleasant and satisfying feeling I had hoped for, oh no. This was water being squirted alarmingly forcefully deep into my still sore and infected ear, then repeated 5 times. This was ear violation. Things are not meant to go into your ear, that is not what they are designed for. Bits of fungi came out which was both fascinating and gross, then the doctor had another look and told me that there was still a lot of fungi growth, I needed 10 more days of antifungal drugs, and 2 more ear cleaning sessions: one tomorrow and one in a week. Not the conclusion I was hoping for I must admit. This was all made more stressful by the fact that the doctor mumbled in thickly-accented spanish. Not only is my spanish not good, I am also half deaf right now, so I definitely feel like I missed half of the story.
But to 360 back to my original point, I am, surprisingly, quite happy. It’s really great to not be in constant pain. For everyone reading this who is not in pain, just take a quick stock of your body and truly appreciate that you are feeling fine right now. What a wonderful feeling. And for those who are in constant pain, my deepest sympathy, it is exhausting and frustrating and horrible.
I was talking to my mum earlier and she said “Sophie you don’t have to be so brave all the time”, but actually I do. When you’re in a different country/place to the people that really love you and you’re suffering, you kind of have no choice but to be brave! What else can you do? I’m not exactly going to jump on a plane home, so I’ve just got to tough this one out. No one can feel your pain for you. What does bring an amazing amount of relief is emotional support. When someone messages you asking if you’re okay, how you’re doing, how you’re feeling; it is so comforting to know there are people out there who worry about you and care for you. So if you do have a sick friend or relative, message them once in a while just to let them know you care.